BIGGS, GIGI, AND SAYING GOOD- BYE FOR NOW

Having to say good-bye to a loved one as they make the transition from this life to Heaven is hard and bittersweet all at once. Hard because the loved one has left and their presence will no longer be there. Bittersweet because the memories and the times together are now more valuable than ever and the knowledge that they are truly in a better place than this realm. That alone can bring a peace beyond all understanding.  A strong matriarchal figure of our family recently died.  Aunt Girl was a strong anchor for each member of our large family. She was so much to all of us and more valuable than riches.  Her advice, compassion, concern, love and humor was worth spending time with.  I loved to hear her stories of their childhood.  Talk about fall- out- the- chair from laughing funny. Oh my!! She was mama's baby sister, and the next to last of 8 children Big mama and Big daddy had.  Mama was the first to enter Heaven many years ago and Aunt Girl would always tell me how her death  left them so full of hurt but future focused.  She came to my rescue when I was an early teen and pregnant. When the rest of the family was shocked, ashamed, embarrassed, and unwilling to help, she came and took me to New York City where she lived and raised me and the baby I carried.  Being a NYC public school teacher, she put me in a pregnant girls school so that I could continue my education.  She said, "I'll raise you and the baby and with God's help we will be alright."  We were.  She would constantly feed me with words of encouragement and support helping me to realize that mistakes don't end your life or stop dreams.  At that time, I can't say that I understood everything she was teaching me, but as I became an adult  with children of my own to raise,  I understood those lessons much better.  She was the vessel God used to bring my oldest daughter into this world.  Otherwise I was considering having an abortion.  She did many things in my life and all of our family members lives like that, but for me that will stand out, for all times.  I love her forever.  So we had to say good-bye to her for now and that was hard.  Through this difficult time,  we as a family experienced a wide range of emotions.  Unity, separation, pain, sorrow, discord, joy, bipartisanism, determination, appreciation, division, love, wonder, just to name a few. I will zoom in on just two of these emotions for this post, and they are determination and appreciation.  I can talk a bit about these two emotions  because  Aunt Girl herself spoke of one in great detail when I visited with her last summer (2013) and by phone on previous occasions.  She talked about how much she appreciated having her baby brother to help her.  He did everything for her and with her. Dr. appointments, grocery shopping, errands, he was there for her.  He enlisted the help of his family as well, which is considerable.  A wife and four adult kids.  Aunt Girl had assistance with everything from bringing mail and newspapers in, grass cutting, car washed and maintained, house cleaned, meals prepared, she had a driver to take her wherever she needed or wanted to go.  She had but to say something, and Uncle Joe and Aunt Janice and cousins sprang into action to assist her.  She talked about these events with love, gratitude and great appreciation.  She shared a funny story about the grocery store,  where she tried to run Uncle over with the shopping cart that you sit in and drive.  She had me laughing so hard at her terrible driving and uncle trying to escape, and how shoppers were watching them act like that in the grocery store. She laughed as she recalled it. She would tell me so many things like that and ending it with, "I don't know what I would do without Joe."  I remember saying how glad I was that she had Uncle Joe in her life.  That's where dedication  enters and takes over. Through what had to be tremendously painful for him, finding his baby sister he loved and cared for, deceased.  He dedicated himself to her final arrangements. From the start to the end,  he made sure all arrangements  were what she would have wanted.  He did as he did in her life, he took care of all necessary preparations from the smallest details to the largest.  He must have used the part of his heart that says this is for my beloved  sister , I'm going to  do this right. All who were willing to work together with him did so. He had to do all this through a bleeding, broken and grieving heart, but do it none the less. He was determined and most dedicated to memoralizing his sister. I watched my uncle with love, respect and admiration, because he fixed his heart and could not be moved. I also felt sympathy for him, Aunt Janice and my cousins, cause they were there for her daily and this death hit them first and hardest. My cousins would take care of her needs as well, like their dad,and when this happened they were the first to discover her. I can appreciate and weep with joy when I learned how my 2 cousins, Michael & Anthony did their last act of lovingkindness for her. How hard that must have been for them emotionally but indeed necessary. I have so much respect for them. I love you cousins. (They too lived with Aunt Girl in NYC when they were young). Aunt Girl would be very proud of you 2 young men. She talked about yall all the time. She especially liked yalls family days with the cookouts and the crab boils at her house back in the day. We would talk by phone and she would go on and on and on about it. You could hear the happiness and excitement in her voice over the phone. So much needed doing and my uncle, aunt and cousins did what was needed. I stayed with them at this time and enter Biggs and GiGi. 2 fury members of the family. Biggs is about 20 lbs. of fur, bark and ankle bite. His bark will send you running for cover, until you learn the secret to his heart, DOG BISCUTS!!! For the treat of a dog biscut, my ankles were saved and his ferocious bark ceased. How easy he is to bribe!! Once I was let in on this secret, I made sure to utilize it. He was soon my friend and shared his house with me. He let me pet him a few times and I felt so special. GiGi was a bit different. She is about 15lbs of fur and friendliness. She's a bit timid and gentle. She became my friend instantly and it didn't take a treat to do it although I gave her one each time Biggs got one. Her little face seem to say "I love you even if you don't give me a treat". She was so sweet. My last day there I was packing to leave and return to N.C.,and all weepy and a bit sad. I was home alone and watching a western on t.v. Thinking about Aunt Girl's funeral and our family, I wondered what would happen. GiGi came into the room with me and jumped on the sofa and put her fury little face in my lap. I felt such a peace at that moment, and I said to her "you came to keep me company?' She nuzzled and I rubbed her and thanked her for sharing her house with me. This may sound wierd or strange, but I felt God's presence in the room and a peace I can't explain come over me. Joy filled my spirit. The Scriptures talk about how God uses the foolish things of this world to confound the wise and the weak things of this world to confound the things that are mighty (1Cor.1:27). For me and at that moment, I felt that scripture come alive and put me in another place. A peace place. It has not been too long, but when I look back to Aunt Girl's death and all the events that took place, my memory takes me to Biggs and GiGi. There is a sort of special peace there in that memory. I see and understand much better than before why people value their pets so much. These 2 dogs had a job to do and without complaint, they did what God told them to do. I'll always remember how these 2 dogs made me feel the entire time I was there. And so my family shall once again pick up the pieces and move forward. We all trust God, Jesus is the Lord of our lives and we believe the scriptures. We know we will see our loved ones again in that wonderful, glorious place not of this earth. Until then rest in peace. Thank God for the comfort of the Holy Spirit (John 14:16) each day, but during times like these it is worth more than I can say. The peace that the Holy Spirit brings, Jesus Peace is my fear- slayer. Family we will let God carry us forward with His hope. Let us allow the scriptures and our relationship with God through Jesus Christ carry us daily. I love you all and cherish our times together!! Peace. God bless and keep our family and everyone. John 14, 1Corithians13, 1John4:4,18- 21, Psalm 20, Psalm 23 Jesus is LORD!!!AMEN